> >> Who? You are just making these up as you go along aren't you?
> > If you follow motorsports, you'd know the name. Except it took me > > /years/ to realise the name wasn't Danny Kirpatrick. Similarly, the > > Italian cyclist Bernardino is actually French cyclist Bernard Hinault...
> >> > A. Summers
> >> Ah, now I've heard of him... Something to do with a donkey and some > >> Brylcreem wasn't it??
> > Runs a chain of 'adult' shops, doesn't she?
> PShurley even you youngsters have heard of "The Police"?
> hey pal, it's called SOCCER, not FOOTBALL. America plays FOOTBALL. > Brits play SOCCER. The reason they play soccer is that it requires no > money to play. Shit all you need is a round ball. FOOTBALL has far > more strategy than a couple of punks kicking a ball around.
The rest of the world plays 'football' - where the foot is used to kick a ball. Correspondingly, America play 'handegg'; the etymology should be fairly obvious.
>>FOOTBALL is played in the USA. Soccer is played in Britville
> Yes, Eddy. Nothing says "MANLINESS" like a bunch of sweaty, muscle- > bound men in tights falling in heaps and slapping each other's > behinds. Yes, so ridden of testosterone is your beloved American > football game. You man, you.
Actually if you overdose on steroids to beef up your muscles as most(?) American handegg players do, there is likely to be a corresponding decrease in masculinity ie shrunken penis, shrivelled testicles. It's not testosterone-fueled aggression (unless the players are given testosterone supplements too) but steroid-rage.
>>>It's all ghey. Truly hard men don't do team sports, they join the armed >>>forces and kill people.
>>Sailors excluded, of course...
> Heh. GPWM. 90% of wounds sustained in naval battle are to the penis.
That was one hell of a shot to hit the eye of Nelson's penis. (What did he say afterwards - "I semen no ships" or something similar). And William the Conqueror would have been proud of shooting an arrow into the eye of King Harold's penis.
Actually King Harold wasn't a sailor - strike that last one.
> >>> FOOTBALL is played in the USA. Soccer is played in Britville.
> Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? > Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? > Stupid fucking game anyway.
If you'd keep your hands away from your dick, the blisters might heal.
>>>> FOOTBALL is played in the USA. Soccer is played in Britville.
>Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? >Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? >Stupid fucking game anyway.
> >>> FOOTBALL is played in the USA. Soccer is played in Britville.
> Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? > Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? > Stupid fucking game anyway.
Like I said, Only a man understands Real Football. Now go outside and kick the 3 dollar ball around in a cheap pair of shorts, wearing the same jock strap you wore when you were nine.
dick blisters set the following eddies spiralling through the space-time continuum:
> Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? > Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? > Stupid fucking game anyway.
REAL men (and boys) play rugby. The ball is more or less the same shape as in American "foot"ball, bot at least it does get kicked properly with the feet at defined points in the game. And the players don't wear (or need) all that elaborate padding. -- ξ:) Proud to be curly
Prai Jei wrote: > dick blisters set the following eddies spiralling through the space-time > continuum:
>> Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? >> Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? >> Stupid fucking game anyway.
> REAL men (and boys) play rugby. The ball is more or less the same shape as > in American "foot"ball, bot at least it does get kicked properly with the > feet at defined points in the game. And the players don't wear (or need) > all that elaborate padding.
Rugby is a kick-ass sport, and I wish it was more popular here in the US.
That said, the offside rule and ban on forward passes is too restrictive.
Australian Rules Football is an interesting alternative. Players can be pretty much anywhere on the field, and while there are still no forward passes, the kicks and marks/fair catches serve the same purpose.
Prai Jei wrote: > REAL men (and boys) play rugby. The ball is more or less the same shape as > in American "foot"ball, bot at least it does get kicked properly with the > feet at defined points in the game. And the players don't wear (or need) > all that elaborate padding.
Unfortunately, at the top level, the advantages of bulking up rugby players because of the physical damage they can cause has belatedly been discovered by coaches - consider the number of England players currently out injured. Add in the dangers of the likes of eye-gouging, spear tackles and scrum collapsing and you can make a pretty strong case for rugby players needing more protection.
There's no such need for protection in Association Football - indeed, excess padding would represent a significant disadvantage - so spectators are treated to a flowing sport with lots of skill and physical prowess. However even with Association Football, coaches have discovered the advantages that bulking up in certain areas can bring, thigh muscles for example, so certain players are victims to an unnatural frequency of groin strains plus there's a growing incidence of roid rage.
Not naming anyone in particular, but those symptoms certainly fit a certain Liverpuddle icon.
> dick blisters set the following eddies spiralling through the space-time > continuum:
>> Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? >> Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? >> Stupid fucking game anyway.
> REAL men (and boys) play rugby. The ball is more or less the same shape as > in American "foot"ball, bot at least it does get kicked properly with the > feet at defined points in the game. And the players don't wear (or need) > all that elaborate padding.
Nor do they need half the *brains* (for rugby) as it has considerably less *strategy* involved than American football. American football involves more than just brainless brawn/athleticism. In many ways, American football is a microcosmic game of *war* with a level of strategic granularity that no other sport even comes *close* to matching -- thus it consequently offers a level of intrigue that no other sport can offer. As a sport, it has an ideal balance between brains and brawn.
It involves personel matchups, game clock management, 'spying' on opposing teams players (and sometimes even the opposing coaches ;-)), off-field strategic personel/business maneuvers, play-calling and play calling adjustments, specialized 'forces' (special teams players with advance skills).
> dick blisters set the following eddies spiralling through the space-time > continuum:
>> Why do they call it football when their feet hardly ever touch the ball? >> Why not call it "throw it with your hands ball"? >> Stupid fucking game anyway.
> REAL men (and boys) play rugby. The ball is more or less the same shape as > in American "foot"ball, bot at least it does get kicked properly with the > feet at defined points in the game. And the players don't wear (or need) > all that elaborate padding. > --
Now that's what I call a "real mans game". None of this sissy padding and helmets for protection.
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